Perhaps finally accepting the fact that she will never take over the Hilton hotel chain, Paris Hilton slipped on a sparkly Playboy bunny outfit and partied with Hugh Hefner and Snoop Lion for Playboy's annual Easter egg hunt.
YAY JESUS!
If you didn't know better, Hugh Hefner would just be your average geriatric in a nightclub, wearing a captain's hat and falling asleep surrounded by 30 beautiful women. But he isn't. He's Hugh effing Hefner, people, and he's unsurprisingly taken so many women back to Gollum's lair his bedroom that he's lost track.
Hugh Hefner's secretary of over 40 years, Mary O'Connor, has gone to that great Playboy Mansion in the sky. And the sassy den-mother, who saw scores of playmates bounce their man-made boobies about, will be missed by not only Hef, but by the plasticine ladies who knew her.
Not content with all the tail he was regularly getting in the Playboy Mansion and eager for something deep and real, Hugh Hefner finally tied the knot with generic bimbo Crystal Harris, who was likely eager for bank accounts that were also deep and real.